September 11, 2011

Carole Brody Fleet 8-9 PM

website:, blog:

Book: Widows Wear Stilletos

Carole Brody Fleet is the award-winning author of the critically acclaimed, “Widows Wear Stilettos: A Practical and Emotional Guide for the Young Widow” and “Happily EVEN After: A Guide to Getting Through (and Beyond!) the Grief of Widowhood.” She is widely recognized and highly regarded as an expert in the areas of grief and loss recovery.  She is the founder of Widows Wear Stilettos, Inc. and the popular website,; helping the widowed of all ages find support and education for themselves and for their children.

Topics to be covered (time permitting):

  • Where did the name Widows Wear Stilettos come from?
  • What makes Widows Wear Stilettos different from the other grief books, CD’s, websites, organizations, etc.?
  • What about widowers?  Aren’t you leaving them out?
  • What about those who were unmarried and are going through the same kind of loss (i.e., boyfriend, fiancé’, life partner, etc.) – should they be treated the same as their “technically widowed” counterparts?
  • Is it more difficult to be widowed at a chronologically younger age?
  • What are the most common problems and challenges that chronologically younger widows face and what is the best way to move past those challenges?
  • What do you mean by the “lighter side” of widowhood?
  • So many people use the word “closure” when it come to loss or recovering from any life-altering event.  You maintain that there is no such thing as closure and that the use of the word can be detrimental to those recovering from grief.  With the death of Bin Laden and especially on this tenth anniversary of September 11, we’re hearing that word a lot in reference to the survivors.  Why do you believe there is no such thing as “closure” and that using the word can hurt more than help?
  • How do you treasure and honor your “past” life without actually living in the past?
  • What do you say to people who feel guilty for moving on with their lives post-loss; be it changing homes, changing careers, dating/falling in love again or making any other major decisions?
  • How do you handle people around you who may not necessarily be supportive or positive regarding how you are handling your healing processes and / or decisions that you are making?
  • What are some of the first steps to take at the beginning of any healing journey?
  • Where can we learn more about you and your book?

Related Links:

The Association for Death Education and Counseling


Yulee Schafer 8-9 PM


Yulee Schafer, author of  Am I Supposed To Feel Like This? What to expect when tragedy devastates your life, worked for 12 years as a victim’s advocate in the Office of the Commonwealth’s Attorney in Jefferson County Kentucky working mainly homicide cases. Before that she worked at the YWCA Spouse Abuse Center as the Children’s Recreation Specialist.  She has for the past 20 years been a member of. kentuckians Voice for Crime Victims.

Topics to be covered (time permitting):

1. The information provided in WWS, could it be adopted for anyone suffering a loss.  For example after a divorce, loss of a friendship, children moving out of the home?

How do you address widows who felt/were independent in their marriages and then become widows and feel less independent?
- An example is my very independent mother felt lost after my father passed away.  She did whatever she wanted whenever she wanted but once he was gone she recognized how frequently she got acknowledgements from him. “I’m going to the grocery” “I’m doing whatever” and Dad was there to not necessarily approve or disapprove but was there to acknowledge she was doing something.

3. How do you suggest reconciling when the widow is ready to start dating again and her children and friends are not wanting her to?

4. On the flip side how do you suggest reconciling when the widow is not ready to start dating and her friends and family think she should?

5. Is there a process you suggest for going through the deceased belongings, clothes etc?  The three piles?

6. Do you have practical advice for widows getting involved with another as far as finances, burial plots, living arrangements?

7. If the widow is angry about the death of her spouse how to recommend she work to not let it seep into her current and future relationships?

8. If a widow puts up an emotional wall of protection do you suggest breaking it down and if so how is the best way to do that?


Cathie Borrie 9-10 PM


Book: The Long Hello ~The Other Side of Alzheimer’s

Cathie Borrie has degrees in health & law, but nothing prepared her for the seven years she spent caring for her mother, who had Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s.  Cathie was invited to present and launch her books at MoMA for World Alzheimer’s Day. Excerpts from her lyrical memoir, The Long Hello-The Other Side of Alzheimer’s, have been shortlisted three times in the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation Literary Awards.

Topics to be covered (time permitting):

  • Your willingness to be honest and vulnerable in this memoir is striking. It must have been a difficult book to write. What motivated you to tell this story?
  • Can you share what inspired you to write your book in its very powerful and unusual format?
  • You have had varied careers in nursing, law, and theater.  How did your life experiences prepare you for caring for and being there with your mother?
  • You took ballroom dance lessons when your mother was ill. Did this affect your caregiving?
  • You met your mother in her reality.  You let her lead in conversations.  Why was that approach important to you and your mother?
  • Your mother seems to have been an inspiration for your own poetry. Can you talk about that?
  • You talk about how families and friends started to write your mother off.  Why is this? Were there ways you kept her friends and family visiting and engaged?
  • It seemed that even in the midst of this very difficult time of caregiving and health issues for your mother, you saw this time as a gift.   What was there about this time as a caregiver that added richness to your life?
  • What learning have you taken from your immersion in the world of Alzheimer’s?
  • What are the greatest challenges you’ve experienced in being a caregiver for a parent with Alzheimer’s?
  • Looking back on your journey with your mother, what do you treasure most?  Do you have any regrets?
  • How does this book help people with Alzheimer’s?
  • How does this book help people caring for others with Alzheimer’s?
  • With the far-ranging publicity that your work has received, you’ve established a kind of iconic relationship with the Alzheimer’s issue: has this become a life focus for you?
  • What will your next book be?

Related Links:

Medline Plus: Alzheimer’s Disease

JoAnna Weiss 9-10 PM


JoAnna Weiss is the Director of Education and Outreach at the local Alzheimer’s Association in Louisville. She spends much of her time teaching classes to both families and professionals on Alzheimer’s and related disorders. She holds a master’s degree in Gerontology from Eastern Illinois University, and has spent much of her career working with senior citizens.

Topics to be covered (time permitting):

  • What is the difference between Alzheimer’s Disease and dementia?
  • What types of resources are available in the Louisville area for people with Alzheimer’s disease?
  • What are some warning signs of Alzheimer’s disease?
  • What is the average age that one gets Alzheimer’s?
  • What does one do after the diagnosis of Alzheimer’s has been issued?

Related Links:

Alzheimer’s Association (Support in KY & IN)

Medline Plus: Dementia


Kate Chawansky / Dr. Stan Frager Show / Louisville, KY / producer

Tony Safina / Media researcher / Medical Researcher –


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