1/20/2011 Guest Host: Dr. Eli Karem

Kathy L     8-9 PM

Book: The Intervention Book

Kathy L. has been the 12-step recovery editor for BellaOnline since 2007, writing weekly articles on a variety of topics to support readers throughout their addiction recovery.  Her articles are read internationally and are used to help counselors, therapists, support groups and individuals.  She holds a degree in Education with an emphasis on counseling.

Topics to be discussed (time permitting):

  • 1.  How does your personal story relate to the book?
  • 2.  What does “intervention” mean?
  • 3.  You talk about different types of interventions in the book.  Would you explain those?
  • 4.  How do you really know if a person is addicted and not just engaging in a bad habit?
  • 5.  Does a person have to hit bottom?
  • 6.  Can you stop a person from hitting bottom?
  • 7.  Can certain prescribed drugs stop someone from drinking?
  • 8.  I hear the word “poly addicted”.  What exactly does that mean?
  • 9.  Who would be involved in an intervention?
  • 10. Can you force someone into rehab?
  • 11. How do I find a treatment facility?
  • 12. There are a lot of different types of addictions.  Are the treatments the same?
  • 13. What are the steps I need to take to help my family member/friend who is addicted.
  • 14. How do I know if an intervention and treatment will work long term?
  • 15.  Why did you write this book?


Richard Hart  9pm to 10pm
Website: EndingRape.org; BooksbyRichard.com
Book: Keep Your Daughter Safe: 171 Ways Young Women can Prevent Sexual Assault

Richard Hart has spent five years with San Mateo Police Department and two years with Aid to Victims and Witnesses in a voluntary capacity. He has spoken at various venues on crime prevention strategies. He is author of the award-winning book Keep Your Daughter Safe: 171 Ways Young Women can Prevent Sexual Assault – - a book that Tanya Brown, sister of Nicole Brown Simpson, called ‘a must read for every young woman in America.

Topics to be discussed (time permitting):

  • 1)  What motivated you to write this book?
  • 2)  I think we have to address the Penn State situation even though it technically has nothing to do with keeping young women safe. I can probably still tie the topic into appropriate versus non-appropriate and how victims might not immediately report an event.
  • 3)  You say there is a “huge myth behind women’s self-defense classes.” What are you referring to in this statement?
  • 4)  You describe college campuses as I quote, “some of the most dangerous places women can be.” Can you describe why you believe this to be true?
  • 5)  Just a few weeks ago a 23-year-old man right here in Louisville was brought up on charges of rape – - the exact language was “of someone incapable of giving consent.” Can you go into detail on this and what role alcohol plays in rapes and sexual assaults.
  • 6)  You say “tall dark and handsome does not equal safe.” Can you go into more detail on this?
  • 7)  How do you feel about online dating? Do you consider this safe for women?
  • 8)  What should a woman do if she is assaulted?
  • 9) Can you speak for a few minutes on the impact of rape and sexual assault on the victim and on society?
  • 10) Your book mentions that almost 80% of the victims know their attackers. How can women protect themselves in these situations?
  • 11) We hear things all the time about teenagers being assaulted by online predators. What can we do to protect our daughters from these people?
  • 12) You dedicate an entire chapter in your book to staying safe while driving. I could think there are few safer places to be than in your car. Can you comment on this?

Just a few of the tips from this VERY INFORMATIVE book…

from Chapter 1 – Statistics
FACT: 1 in 4 college women will be sexually assaulted during her tenure as a student. This too, is a Department of Justice statistic.

from Chapter 2 – The Vast Repercussions of Sexual Assault
In his study titled The Mental Health Impact of Rape, Dean Kilpatrick, Ph.D., found the following:

  • Almost one-third of rape victims experienced post-traumatic stress disorder.
  • Rape victims were 3 times more likely than women who were not victims of a violent crime to experience a major depressive episode.
  • A victim of rape was 13 times more likely than a non-crime victim to have attempted suicide.
  • 1 in 8 rape victims has attempted suicide.
  • Rape victims were 13 times more likely to have a problem with alcohol.
  • Rape victims were 26 times more likely to have some type of drug abuse problem.

from Chapter 3 – Myth versus Reality
MYTH: Rapists and sexual predators are easy to spot; they fit a specific profile.
REALITY: First of all, 4 out of 5 assault victims know their assailant. That’s 80%! If the perpetrators readily fit into an easy-to-recognize profile, far fewer attacks would occur.

from Chapter 4 – Attacker Profiles and Their Methods of Operation
Studies have shown the predator is less likely to attack a woman who moves with certainty and purpose as she walks. He is less likely to attempt entry into a home with a dog, or where he feels a second person might also reside.

from Chapter 5 – GHB the Date-Rape Drug
Some women have reported that GHB will have a soapy taste. This IS possible since solvents are used in the making of GHB. However, when properly mixed, there is no ability to detect the presence of GHB in a drink or even a glass of water. This being said, I address this for the primary reason that if a drink you have been drinking suddenly tastes “different” than it did a minute earlier or different than you know the drink should taste, DO NOT finish the drink.

from Chapter 6 – Teenager Online Safety
Tip 4: NEVER agree to meet someone you have connected with online, unless you already know them. And, even if you do already know them, unless he or she is a personal acquaintance, do not meet them alone. Remember, more than 80% of all sexual assaults take place where the victim knows her assailant.

from Chapter 7 – Awareness: Parking Lots, Cars and Public Transportation
Tip 6: Have your key ready to open the door. never stand next to your car searching your purse for your keys. Robbers, car-jackers, and sexual predators all watch for this type of distraction. They wait for this moment to attack.

from Chapter 8 – Awareness: While Walking or Jogging
Tip 2: If someone attempts to start a conversation with you, tell him you are late to meet your boyfriend or husband. Continue walking with purpose. You can be polite, while letting him know that you are not interested. Also, since this man does not actually know your destination, he will have no way of knowing if your “boyfriend” is a mere 30 feet off or a mile away. In this situation, the predator will usually keep moving, preferring to locate another victim. Do not stop walking to engage with this person. Again, even in emergency situations, most men are capable of understanding a single woman’s reluctance to assist.

from Chapter 9 – Awareness: At Bars, Clubs and Parties
Tip 3: NEVER leave your drink unattended. When getting up to dance or use the restroom, you have three options: 1) finish your drink; 2) take it with you; or 3) abandon it. Do not drink from a glass you have left unattended. It only takes a split-second to pour a vial of GHB into a glass. At that point, all the predator needs to do is sit back and wait for the drug to take effect. Even if you are just sitting and chatting, keep a napkin over your drink as an extra precaution.

from Chapter 10 – Awareness: In Your Home or Apartment
Tip 14: If you live alone and someone knocks on the door, as you approach the door, call out something like, “I’ve got it honey.” Make sure you say this loud enough to be heard on the other side of the door. This will give the person at the door the impression there is someone else in the house. (Note: Technically you should always do this even if someone else really is home.)

from Chapter 11 – Awareness: In Offices, Elevators and Stairways
Tip 6: Upon entering an elevator, stand toward the front, as close to the control panel as possible. If something goes wrong, you can hit the alarm button or press all the buttons. Pressing all the buttons will force the elevator to stop at each floor, increasing the odds of someone entering the elevator or giving you a chance to get out.

from Chapter 12 – Awareness: On Job Interviews
Tip 6: If this is your first interview with a company and you are called by someone saying they represent the organization and the caller tells you the meeting location has been changed, cancel the appointment. It is very rare that a legitimate company will send you out for an audition without having first interviewed you at their own offices.

from Chapter 13 – Awareness: Online Dating Sites
Tip 3: If a man’s dating profile pictures make him unrecognizable, I would suggest passing on the profile. Dark glasses, hats, pictures taken at a distance are all signs that a guy is trying to hide something – be it age, lack of hair or even his identity. While there could be a multitude of reasons for this practice, none of these reasons have any benefit to you.

from Chapter 14 – Awareness: Dating and Date Rape
Tip 3: Drive YOUR OWN car to the meeting place. There are several reasons for this.
• You do not yet know the guy you’re meeting. Therefore you cannot know if he has a drinking problem, and you do not want to depend on a drunk driver to get you home safely.
• The guy you’re meeting may turn out to be not “your type.” Therefore, having him know where you live is probably not the best idea.
• If things start to turn sour during dinner, you can leave without worrying about how you’ll be getting home.

from Chapter 15 – Thwarting an Attack
DRUGGING SCENARIO 1: You are in a bar and are starting to feel strange. You have only had 1 or 2 drinks and should not feel the way you do. DO NOT make the mistake of thinking you will begin to feel better. If you are with friends immediately tell them you think you may have been drugged and that you need them to get you to a hospital. If you are not with friends (real friends), find a police officer (most clubs now have on- or off-duty police officers working the front door), a bouncer or manager and tell him/her you think you may have been drugged. Whatever you do, do not allow a male acquaintance or a guy you just met to take you home or to the hospital. This is most likely the person who drugged you.

- – -
Fausta Luchini  9pm to 10 pm

Fausta Luchini is a Licensed Psychological Practitioner, with a Master degree in Psychology from Spalding University and over 15 years’ experience as a psychotherapist. She has worked with trauma survivors, particularly survivors of childhood sexual abuse, and utilizes cognitive processing therapy and dialectical behavior therapy.  Currently working for Seven Counties in Bullitt County, she also has a small private practice, offers workshops and trainings in cognitive behavioral therapy, and serves as a community volunteer.

Topics to be discussed (time permitting):

  • 1) You work with survivors of rape and childhood sexual abuse.  Your approach to preventing rape is a little different from Richard’s.  Tell us a little about this.
  • 2) What’s your experience with women who’ve been assaulted before – how does this affect their perception of safety and how to be safe?
  • 3) If college campuses are, “some of the most dangerous places women can be,”  what advice do you have for college students?
  • 4) What risk factors do you see for women, what makes them less safe?
  • 5) What are the risks or disadvantages connected with trying to stay safe, or trying to make sure your kids safe?
  • 6) What are some ways women can manage the risks of dating, particularly on line dating?
  • 7) What about boys?  Some statistics report that one out of six boys is sexually abused.  Is any of this discussion helpful for them?


Dr Stan Frager Show

8:52-9 PM Sunday November 6, 2011

Blanket Louisville; Kathy and Steve Fehder

Kathy and Steve Fehder, are the Founders of Blanket Louisville, a non-profit organization that began as a school project, and 9 years later, has collected more than 40,000 blankets for the homeless.  Their mission statement is simple – “Warming bodies, Warming hearts!”

Rebecca, Winnie Spitza is on the Board of Blanket Louisville and has lead the blanket collection effort at Bellarmine university for the last several years.

How can people help?

There are no regular “hours” per se, but emails from the website are checked regularly throughout the year, and anyone who wants to collect blankets may do so at any time and we will either deliver them to a shelter in need or hold onto them in our donated storage facility until there is a need.  We are constantly replenishing the stores of the homeless shelters and organizations throughout the winter months.  The largest distribution is before Thanksgiving, followed by a smaller one in Dec, and another in January.  Dropoff locations are:  1642 Spring Drive, Applebees at 4535 Outer Loop, Commonwealth Bank at 286 N. Hubbards Ln, 40207, St. Brigid Catholic Church at 1520 Hepburn Avenue, 4020, The Plant Kingdom, 4101 Westport Rd, St. Mary & Elizabeth Hospital (in the Health Resource Center off the Main Lobby), Medical Center Northeast (at the front desk), Jewish Hospital – Shelbyville (in the lobby), and Norton-Suburban Hospital on Dutchmans Ln (main entrance lobby).

Blanket Louisville collects most of the blankets during a one month collection campaign every year from mid-october to the Friday before thanksgiving, at which time they go with trucks to collect all the blankets from the many different schools, businesses, organizations, and individuals that have collected during the campaign.  Then, on the Saturday before Thanksgiving, they distribute those blankets to all the different homeless shelters and organizations in the Louisville area.  There is a second, smaller collection in mid-December for those who either came on board late or weren’t able to join in the earlier effort.

Thanks to tonight’s guest host:  Dr Eli Karem

“Eli Karam, Ph.D., LMFT is a clinician specializing in couple and family therapy and maintains a private practice in Louisville, KY. Dr. Eli is currently the President Elect for the Kentucky Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (KAMFT) and an Assistant Professor in the Family Therapy Program in the Kent School of Social Work at the University of Louisville. There he conducts research on couple and family relationships, teaches and supervises therapists-in-training”

Kate Chawansky / Dr. Stan Frager Show / Louisville, KY / producer
Tony Safina / Dr. Stan Frager Show / Louisville, KY / Media Researcher ~ Tips from Tony & Dr. Stan
(during the week Tony keeps busy doing medical research for lawyers & research for Fortune 500 clients concerning enterprise search, knowledge management, digital forensics, the semantic web, faceted search, open source content, e-discovery, health informatics, and other topics. Contact Tony at tony@iglou.com and put DR STAN in your subject so Tony can distinguish your important email from the daily spam tally.)

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